Tuesday, October 26, 2004

If Iraqis thought Bush was the devil, wait 'til they hear this

Britain is in an uproar: Chris Cranmer, a devil-worshipping non-commissioned officer in the Royal Navy, has become the first registered Satanist in the British Armed Forces. This allows him to perform Satanic rituals aboard and permits him to have a funeral carried out by the Church of Satan should he be killed in action.
According to the Telegraph,
The Church of Satan was founded in San Francisco in 1966 by its high priest, Anton Szandor LaVey, author of The Satanic Bible. Adherents live by the Nine Satanic Statements, which include "Satan represents vengeance, instead of turning the other cheek", "Satan represents all of the so-called sins, as they lead to physical, mental or emotional gratification", and "Satan represents indulgence, instead of abstinence"... Satanists are encouraged to perform rituals in worship of the Devil, to fulfil their sexual desires and to change situations or events in accordance with their will. Ritual trappings can include a black robe, an altar, the symbol of Baphomet (Satan), candles, a bell, a sword, a gong and a model phallus.
That should certainly liven things up on his ship.
Chris -- who, according to his mum, is a 'sweetie' -- told The Telegraph that 'he realised he was a Satanist nine years ago when he "stumbled across The Satanic Bible. I then read more and came to realise I'd always been a Satanist, just simply never knew."'
I do have a question or two about what kind of society officially recognises this non-religion, and whether any interfaith dialogue is planned for the ship. But instead, I'll leave you with my favorite quote from Chris: "Freedom to practise my religion irrespective of location was one of the most important factors. I didn't want to feel I couldn't get out my Satanic Bible and relax in bed. I didn't want to bite my tongue any more when dealing with idiots."
Get out his Satanic Bible and relax in bed???? What kind of Satanist is that???
The devil knows.

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